For several months, I’ve been trying to change a habit of mine, which is: to not check work related WhatsApp messages and emails on Sundays.
However, despite multiple efforts, wasn’t able to get off the habit.
Same thing happened yesterday. I attended to work messages in the first half.
In the second half, I went to play badminton with my nephews and nieces. As a result, when I came back, still I didn’t open their WhatsApps. I didn’t have the urge in the first place!
It shows the power of physical activity on our mind, and how much controlling power we have.
No matter how important or urgent the work is, nothing is more important than the much-needed nothingness.
If you want better results, make better choices.
If you want the same results, make the same choices.
If you want worse results, do nothing.
We are not what we do. We are what we choose to do. And that makes a world of difference.
You reflected on something that you wanted to change.
And you decided to change.
The question is: Till when?
Not only for one day or two. What are you doing to make change stick?
Before forming one more new habit and failing at all of them and calling yourself a failure, create a plan for sticking to just one habit.
And then the next. Drop by drop. Dip by dip.
If you look at your day, you’ll find several things to make the radical shift.
And to look at all of them might sound demeaning.
So here’s the way to change your life:
Change just one thing in your day that causes you most pain.
Just one. Not three. Not five. Just one.
Maybe you check your phone just for ten minutes in the morning and it may get your schedule haywire.
Maybe you have your dinner quite late.
Maybe you get distracted easily in your environment.
What is it that causes you the most pain?
Tackling just one thing will lead to domino effect of life altering habits.
So you all may have started new habits during quarantine and also gave up on many of them.
Here’s the way to keep up with a habit:
Show up till Day 3. Not for one day, not for two.
When you show up on Day 3, you will gather the momentum to continue it further.
Always works. If you do the work.
In all the things that everyone describes as “normal”, we all have one thing that we DON’T do.
Even if everyone in the world is doing it, we don’t do it.
In “Thinking, Fast and Slow”, the author Daniel Kanheman talks about why we tend to lower down the volume in the car while searching for parking spots – because parking requires a thought process and even music comes as a distraction.
It is such a subconscious process, that we hardly realise that we do
it. As it comes to doing weird things with my life, I can never work with music.
Nor can I read a book accompanied with music.
Not even meals :/
That focus is a necessity for me, and music comes in when I am seriously sitting idle or (the good old days) when we were allowed to drive on the roads:)
Like most people, I DON’T listen to music “at all times”!
Why don’t your efforts come to fruition when you try too hard, ever thought about it?
What happens when the result of your effort does not match what it should be?
At a core level, we don’t believe that we deserve that success.
Why don’t we believe that? Because we are probably hanging around with:
• same people
• same habits
Which ones are holding you back?
When we sit to meditate, we sit for having an appointment with our own thoughts.
It means the thoughts where we felt abandoned, hurt, egoistic, irrational, powerless, etc. all come to the surface.
That’s why most people don’t sit down to meditate.
And that is the reason you must sit down to meditate. Meditate means “tapasya” in Hindi, which in turn means “to burn”.
Burn all your weak habits and attitudes that aren’t serving you my friend.
And if that’s something you want to live with, don’t meditate.
There is a lot of psychology that goes behind everything.
Everything means what you do, with whom you do it, why do you do it; and more than anything else, what is it that you’re doing.
So if you find yourself doing something or seeing something that you aren’t very proud of or that you shouldn’t be saying, that’s probably because you need to change your company.
Just reading this you people think that it’s not possible.
Well everything that you once thought impossible once is just a simple thing for you today.
What you really need to do is make a decision and not only make a decision. Also, make a decision in your habits that no matter what, you will not do it and when you make that decision every single day just watch your life change.
Of course you can. Start appreciating people for what they are good at and see their nature change.
Btw, the best way to change the nature of others is firstly by changing your own nature.
When your life example comes as a live example for everyone there is no way they can’t change.
This is what you are looking for.