Nishtha Gehija

It’s 9.09 at night.

I have been procrastinating on getting my car’s air pressure checked for a week. No more. I must drive to the petrol pump.

En route to the petrol pump, I figured we are not too far away from getting the petrol refilled. So I do that as well.

As the car stands, I have to wait for half-a-minute till the petrol waale bhaiya comes over and opens my petrol lid, as I sit calmly with my elbow and head dangling out of the car window (the callousness that you don’t get to do while driving).

“Premium waala, XX rupaye ka”, I tell him. They say the expensive petrol (which is ~₹8 per litre more than the normal) does not have ethanol added to it.

As the petrol is transferring containers, I think of where I came from. I was worried almost the whole day for something; and when I communicated that to a friend, things got sorted. How no one on my family ever believed in me, no matter how much they loved me. How they did not give me anything responsible to do, unless I got out and made my life and did more responsible things than them.

Such trivial things – the act of refilling and conversation with a friend, and how you realise life is indeed nothing more than tiny seemingly insignificant things.

Just keep walking, and keep doing the little things. We need nor change anything about our loved ones, we simply change how we show up to love ourselves.

Signed up for a 4-hour session this morning. 9am-1.15 pm.

Took notes for 36 pages.

Took proper breaks as well as drank water, went to pee.

And learnt so, so much.

Nothing heals like education does. No matter what your age.

By 30, you have had enough 6-7 years of work experience on an average.

If by this time you do not do what you love, two things happen: You become a walking human who makes money, but is dead inside. Or, you develop the courage to do what your heart wants to do.

Every thing is difficult, but oh, the pain of betraying yourself while pretending to smile…

It is like a resident. Just like sometimes you adopt a stray by not housing them, but the fact that they come to your door every day for treat.

It comes, it visits, it goes. The pet. The pain. The invited. The uninvited. Everything goes. You don’t need to go with it.

Consistently going forward.

For most days, it means doing something productive each day.

And for those who are consistently productive, to take some active rests.

All shopping, phone, insta stories, proving to others you are rich — fade in the face of progress.

Every human being must build systems around resting. Ideally, take an off on the weekends and take a nap in the afternoons.

Wokes might want to say “she is not working as hard, we are working 24*7*365, never resting, and so on.”

Babe, you are not taking an off, that is why your mind did not get space to be relaxed, and hence, it is working 365 days of the year, and still not feeling productive.

With me, each time I am honest and try to put boundaries around my resting time, it is met with disdain and dismissiveness towards them, the person.
Bro, I need rest for myself. It is nothing against you.

Every. Single. Person. hates someone who prioritises well-being over socialising.

So you only find two kinds of people: Who are burnt out. And who say they are burnt out (so they are not accused for resting).

The world will hate you if you do not receive calls, do not socialise, or are actively trying to unplug for your mental peace. But the samosa and chaat eating world has also hated on khichdi eating world, just like humans watching TV all night have hated protein bros for hitting the gym consistently.

Care too much about the hate, and you care too little for yourself.

It is all the more important to be relaxed. Especially in our conversations with people.

A chaotic mind is no cause to take away someone else’s calm.

1. Speak up for yourself
2. Speak up against bullies
3. Prioritise yourself
4. Protect yourself
5. Protect your time
6. Protect yourself from predators of your goodness
7. Protect your money

You can be a giver out into the world only when you have given to yourself. “Nothing flows out of an empty cup.”

We believe having things, having people, having validation, having money will solve for that.

But how can anything external fill an inner void?

When you tell a woman she missed an attachment in an email, she responds:

“Sorry. Here it is.”

When you tell a man he missed an attachment in an email, after blaming your inbox and not his email skills, arguing about that for some time, and then being “shown” that there is no attachment, he responds:

“Did you go through the doc I sent you?” And before you could remind him again that he missed the attachment, he, without waiting for your response, says, “No problem, do that today.”

Empathy is a choice that flows through ears and gets executed by extinguishing ego.

I only read two, but oh wow, I will cherish them for the rest of my life: The Palace of Illusions and The Forest of Enchantments, both by Chitra Banerji Divakaruni.

I am even yearning to write an essay each on the the learnings I got from the books, especially from the Palace. May my execution beat procrastination.

Apart from that, spiritual studies. And a bit of “Let Them Theory” by Mel Robbins here and there.

This is the season I find myself driven towards memoirs, so looking forward to reading Shefali Shah’s “The Audacity of Being” now, and going deeper into self-help. (Call self-help cringe, but that is what helps us all.)

Ciao. Happy reading 🙂

1. When you want to express change in your actions, change your actions. Expressing first only leaves you weaker.
2. Dhairya rakho. Let God. You do not need all the answers today.
3. “You teach people how to treat you,” said Oprah. And each time you condone a bad behaviour, you condone the standards of goodness you have set for yourself.

Masters of showing up for work with grace.

Masters of taking breaks.

Masters of our own minds.

Masters of protecting our minds from waste.

Masters of being aware what we need mastery on, what not to surrender ourselves to just on a whim.

“The game is more or less in the mind. I have never been a guy who practised a lot even when I was playing all three formats…

“To follow a free mind you need a fit body. For me I stay fit and then I am able to visualise the game in the way that I want to play, which allows me the best chance to go out there and execute in the way I did tonight.”

Two things here:

1. ALL the game is in the mind. Visualising (all the law of attraction and manifestation books talk about it) is the key even for Virat.
2. For those on the sidelines, they might often wonder what is Anushka’s role in Virat’s career and success. I would say a stable relationship like theirs allows him to have a free mind. We all have seen or been in relationships where even after knowing the person for years we just know that they don’t care (even though we do not accept that). And people like Anushka or wives which do not “actively” do a lot on the field of career are rarely noticed, but that stability is what allows their husbands to go out there and win the world.

When I used to travel for work in all my previous jobs, sometimes you would come across a live performance like this in some hotel of Rajasthan.

The most beautiful thing about these natives, whether in a hotel of Rajasthan or any other hotel where the live performance is taking place, are in a trance of enjoying their performance. Are they doing it for money? Yes. But that does not deter them from putting their heart and soul into the performance.

There is so much to learn from true artists, if we all had the eyes to see…

The same need that makes aunties chat with each other while they are in an important conversation with a bigger bunch of people.

The same need that people do not let others finish and get to responding to their questions, often with a complaining indignation.

The same need that makes people say 10 sentences where 5 words would have sufficed.

And that is the need in every human being. Few, few have it met through the right sources. The rest of us are blabbering.

So, what is the right way to be heard?

Journal. If you cannot write sentences, write 5 top things that are bothering you or were the highlight of the day. Just 5 words every morning and 5 words every evening. Sometimes when I am too tired, I just verbally sit in my meditation place and tell God everything. Other days, I simply write a one-sentence journal.

This one practice gives you so much clarity, that the world would think how is it even possible. Until it is possible one day, and you realise there is NOTHING more powerful in the world than this.

Fun fact: I am so dependent on note-book for my thinking that I can go anywhere without my phone but never my notebook.

Oprah said this recently on Mel Robbins podcast, and it is such a profound thing to do.

We all often love to stick to our word because what would people say, that she is such a fickle minded person. But when you have better information, better data, better intuition, you always have the right to change your mind, as Oprah says.

And it is not just woo-woo. In August 2025, Taylor Swift appeared on New Heights podcast and said her 12th album would have only 12 tracks. She mentioned it explicitly that there is going to be no 13th, 14th track and so on.

Lo and behold, tonight, more than a year later, 4 more tracks from the same album are announced.

If the biggest pop star in the world, whose every move, every statement, every exclamation is analysed, can change her mind, so do you and I have the right to change your mind.

1. Build a device-free life that you enjoy.
2. Go outdoors daily.
3. Do not skip 1 and 2 for your sanity.

Make money. Build a corpus. Tell no one in your family, friends or social media.

Dear people above 70,

I get it, it is difficult for you to carry yourself now, vis-a-vis when you were younger.

But you would be delighted to know that people would love to help you if you ask.

The other day a 78 year old complained to me out of the blue that he sat in a satsang for 4 hours the day before, was miserable when he got up, and then he had too much pride to get a conveyance, so he walked to his home.

Well, it is disastrous to sit continuously for 4 hours straight, even if you are a 25-year old. You need to plan getting up yourself, no one is going to do that for you. Also, just in case you are not able to get a conveyance, often people at a satsang are helpful to drive 2 km and drop you.

The reason the old people feel so miserable is because they are lonely. And in their subconscious they want to be seen. So how do old people feel seen? When they are struggling. Just like young people.

It is not something they do on purpose, but your subconscious has a way of handing you exactly what you are looking for.

But I really wonder if all the validation is worth it if it compromises your health, whether you are 8, 18 or 80.

…

PS: The above applies to every single young person as well. You need to be looking for solutions instead of surrendering to situations. You are always in control.