Validation is a sneaky game. It gets in through a hole underneath your main door, and makes you believe that it’s quintessentially the hero of your home.
Sadly, it sneaks in so softly that you don’t even realise that it has taken hold of you.
At some point of time, almost all of us have fallen into this need for validation. We believe that’s how life is supposed to be.
Wait, there’s a deeper side to it.
We need validation because we fear rejection.
We fear rejection because we think that we may not be liked by people we are most wanting to impress.
That feeling of not being liked, makes our ego shatter. It’s so deeply ingrained that at the time of needing validation, we’ve even forgotten that it’s the ego that is wanting to be liked.
When not liked, ego 0, reflection 1. That is a scary place to be. To see all your vulnerabilities surfaced and wanting them not to drown you, just scares the hell out of us.
What if, trying the other way round: Remembering that you’re whole and complete. If at any time you’re not liked by others, there are times when you’re liked by others.
Neither of these define who you are – it’s simply their perception.
Learn from feedback, let go of criticism, because inside you are perfect, outside we all are in the process of chipping away the non-required stuff.