There’s a very close relationship of mine, where I do not feel the need to be around them anymore. We’ve been very well connected, to the extent that when I used to cry alone miles away, she used to have an intuition that something is wrong with me.
Then today, I had a conversation with a mutual friend, who said she has been pushing him to convince me to take a major life step, which I do not want to take.
Then it really hit me to connect the dots. Just because this person does not respect my life choices at an inner level, I had been consistently losing this feeling of being around them.
That is such a deep thing. Not because I was #betrayed. Okay maybe I was, however a deeper thing was that we always act out basis what is happening there inside.
There are no two sides. The white ultimately becomes light grey shortly which ends up becoming black over a period of time.
Trust is something you build when they’re not watching. Hard to build trust with someone if you don’t trust yourself.
I don’t have anger against them, I only have blessings for them to trust and respect themselves. Because it takes a broken person from inside to disrespect and not give trust to the other person’s choices.
Yesterday I received a call from someone who usually does not talk with me. Also, I avoid talking with them because they consistently criticise me for my life choices. (Fun fact: This was not an ex :D)
However, instead of being more mindful, I happened to answer their call. And they followed suit – to give me opinions and tell why my life choices are not right.
This usually does not bother me, however the person on the other side was someone whom I respected in the past. A lot.
I finally hung down the phone and got myself back to normal through self-talk.
Today morning when I called up home, Papa asked: “Why are you appearing so out of place?”
While I ignored that question and drifted our conversation to other things, I finally told him everything.
Here’s how he responded to me:
1. You do not have to ignore their calls, just decide what you will pay attention to or what you will not pay attention to.
2. It may so happen that out of 10 bad things they say about you, one of those things really happen to turn out in your favour.
3. Learn to listen to critics, they are more valuable than friends, because they make you realise the importance of self-love.
Learning from wisdom and experience of elders truly collapses the learning curve.
PS: Love yourself, no one else is going to change their opinions to love you.