Life lessons at Rishikesh – 2.0

I tried high rope walking in the morning. Was veryyyy scared. Gave up. I wasn’t even ready to jump off the harness when I decided to give up. Was pushed.

Tried climbing the wall in the evening. Failed again.

But didn’t have even an iota of regret. It’s better to try and fail than to not try at all, I suppose.

Other than that, I really need to work on my looks. Looking way more untidy or it is lack of confidence due to so-called friends not being around.

So much of a normal day. Yet so much to learn.

Life is epic. With life lessons coming in.

Paisa hi paisa

Very recently, my landlord Uncle and Aunty reduced the rent of my rented apartment.

After thanking them, I jokingly added: “I was, btw, expecting the rent to rise this year!”

“Beta actually we have let out other floors as well, and we’re charging them this lower rate only. So no point charging you a higher amount!”

I found it so cool. This new place is actually so cool bro!
Not just for the rent reduction.
Rather also because they played it honest, even though no one was seeing them.

If you really want to understand someone, see what they do when no one is watching.

PS: Other cool things they do:
1. Having a separate invertor for us tenants, whose electricity bill is attached to theirs
2. NO charges for water
3. Hiring a maid for me
4. Adding an additional (jaali waala) gate so that I can shut it and sleep in natural air.
5. Asking if I need some repairs – any time an electrician or a plumber comes.

Love love, to them! :))

Lessons from the lit train journey

Travelling in a train right now.

Started late afternoon. Will reach at night.

Thought something incredible:

During the day, when we peep out the glass window, we see nature.

As it gets dark, and we peep out, all that we see is our own reflection. Nothing external.

Darkness reveals ourselves to us. The pain, powerlessness and peeping for peace – show us who we really are.

No matter how much we wait for the morning to come, if we ignore the dark, we create another version of our dark in the light as well.

Travel diaries

Travelled from Kota to Delhi via train today.

The view itself made me more productive. Nature, itself, is a great healer.

Some lessons:

  1. Travel gives more ideas. Why not travel to nature, daily?
  2. I was surrounded by a Punjabi family, who spoke to me in Punjabi. What a great way to assume 🙂 Btw, nicely generous people (and I will ignore the fact that they pushed their daughter to look up to me to see how I was working! Can you guys give yourselves a break? Dude, you were returning from Goa, why do you expect anyone to be working when they are returning from Goa?)
  3. Half of the coach was empty. A good way to live luxuriously.
  4. Did I tell you, my productivity was at its peak? None of my colleagues knew I was travelling (not to hide anything from them – we are anyway a chill lot), nor did I tell them – because work was getting done.
  5. It is important to give yourself some treats of solitude.

Had some more reflections, however, for now I want to sleep. So, see you tomorrow! Good night 🙂

Pro tips for productivity

  1. Go for a walk to the parking of your home’s building during working hours. We can’t wait for offices to open up, to get our much needed share of outdoors.
  2. Read a lot, baby!
  3. Be kinder than necessary.
  4. Request, instead of dictate.
  5. Apply #4 for yourself as well.

The First Therapy Session

Had the first therapy session today.

Who in the world talks about it openly?

Well, we haven’t been open, that is why we have been needing therapy 🙂

On that note, it felt a bit better. Even though it will take some time to heal unseen wounds of years, well, all is well that starts well. 😊

How past trauma affects work

Someone I know was in a bad relationship in the past.
Multiple traumatic experiences with the same guy.
He used to leave her, then come and physically and mentally exploit her, and the chain continued for several years.

Until one day she finally got the courage to get up and leave.

But you know what, this trauma continued for several years in her work as well.

She believed she was not deserving of getting her needs met at work, so she wanted to leave from work at the tiniest of discomfort.
She never went up to talk to her clients or bosses, because she was never spoken to in the most intimate relationships.
More than anything else, if anyone at work praised her work, she felt it was a lie just like the guy “loved” her and went away multiple times.

Here’s the truth: When you look at that guy, his social media profiles, his work background, he comes across as an Angel. Like no one could be as divine as him. Yet he is the cause of someone else’s deepest trauma.

Sometimes it helps to see that our desire for needs becomes someone’s long-term pain. Are we ready to bear the consequence of that karma?

Chinta na kar, ye pal bhi beet jayega

Chinta na kar.
Ye pal bhi beet jayega.

Wo aansuon ki dhaara
Wo samay ka ishara
Wo beparwah awara
Ye pal bhi beet jayega

Khud pe bharosa rakh ke to dekh
Apni baatein khud se kar ke to dekh
Khushi ko apna banaa ke to dekh
Khushi bhi teri mohtaj ban jayegi
Aur ye pal bhi beet jayega

Wo apne jo paraaye ho gaye
Wo paraaye jo kabhi apne the hi nahi
Wo kisse jo puraane ho gaye
Wo hisse jo kabhi apne the hi nahi
In begaani si baaton me
Tujhe khud ka sahara mil jayega
Chinta na kar
Ye pal bhi beet jayega

Wo toote sapne
Wo jhoothe vaade
Wo dard bhare din
Wo sooni raatein
Sabko intezaar hai to sirf ek baat ka
Ki tu kab
Beete hue kal ko chhorkar
Aane waale pal ke geet gayega
Chinta na kar
Ye pal bhi beet jayega

Wo tera khushi se jhoom uthna
Wo khud par vishwas mein pahaad ulta dena
Na duniya ki chinta
Na apno ka dar
Kuch tere paas tha
To wo tha junoon har pahar
Ye khoya khoya samay bhi vapas jayega
Chinta na kar
Ye pal bhi beet jayega

Ye pal bhi beet jayega
Ye pal bhi beet jayega

Stories on the street

Each morning as I walk or drive for around ten minutes to go to my meditation class, there are countless stories to witness on the street.

Here’s the two I witnessed today:

  1. A man was standing with his cart containing buckets of pickles. That is what he would be selling whole day, to make a living. Here he was, standing in a corner, serving pickle in a small bag. He then called out to the trash collector to come, so he could have his breakfast.
    Such beautiful thing. Most of us don’t do philanthropy because we feel we ourselves don’t have enough. But it is only in giving, that we receive the most. You do not have to empty your bank accounts. A small act of care each day, is more than enough. If someone who makes his living selling pickles can do it, what excuse do you and I have?
  2. Another woman was brooming the road, with the broom taylor made for thick surfaces. It is unlike the one that we use in our homes. It’s streaks are thicker, which makes it easier to remove dust from there.
    As this woman was brooming the road, I noticed a strange thing: that I could not observe dust on the road. Yet, as she broomed, the dust became prominent in every movement.
    That was a beautiful lesson: around how the deepest things are not visible. It is only through tough scratching that they surface. So are the things in our lives. Our deepest pains are buried behind us cracking jokes, being on time, being addicted to work, etc. Only when a deeper pain comes that it brings all that is within – to the forefront.
    A wonderful reminder of how we pain brings the best in us.

That said, there is a third story as well – story of you and I – walking on the roads, streets, malls, etc.
We get the stories that we see. And we become them.

The question is: What do we see?