My life is finished. COMPLETELY FINISHED.
I received this text message from a guy who was supposedly seeing me back in 2016.
This message was in lieu of his non-response to my messages for many hours (which usually didn’t happen), and suddenly this one popped up at 11 pm.
Since I was a fool back then, I inquired (read: begged) him multiple times, as to what happened.
Here’s what had happened:
He had logged in to my irctc (Portal for booking trains) account, and saw that I had booked a ticket from Delhi to Ahmedabad.
So, the nuances are, that I was going to a meditation retreat in Mt. Abu, and Ahmedabad is a subsequent station. Whenever there aren’t enough seats available in Rajdhani Express for the Delhi – Mr. Abu route, the smart way is to book your ticket till Ahmedabad and get off at Mt. Abu.
Now, why did he have a problem with Ahmedabad?
Because the guy I used to see before him (yes, I stopped at making two mistakes, no more :D), stayed in Ahmedabad. And this smart fellow thought I was going to be disloyal to him by going to Ahmedabad.
Now as I am happy getting out of that relationship, at that time also I knew that this fellow won’t ever listen to anyone, as his head is filled with his ego.
But here’s what I thought:
– Do I have to go to Ahmedabad to be infidel to this guy? Can’t I do that while sitting in Delhi itself?
– Why in the world would I book a train from Delhi to Ahmedabad? Bhaai flight na le lu?
– If I had to be infidel, why would I share my irctc password with him?
However, this guy had given me enough signs that the only reason he was in this relationship was to vent out frustration of his existing one, and the only reason I was in that relationship was because I was a fool!
I begged him to listen to me, where he responded with “I can prove it to you that tickets till Mt. Abu were available but you booked till Ahmedabad.”
That moment, that very moment where he “could prove to me but still did not because sure, I give you the privilege of my carried forward trust,” in that moment I lost my respect for him.
Honestly, both of us knew the relationship was going to end soon, but it was that moment that I actually stopped caring of what he thought.
If you truly trust someone and then you see a glimpse of something that raises your eyebrows, you talk to them. Simple. You talk to them.
You don’t stop responding to their texts, return with “My life is finished. COMPLETELY FINISHED,” and then finally allow them to avail you again! Yikes.
May no one he loves be treated like the way he treated me.
Anyway, what’s the point of sharing this here?
1. This behaviour of this person was not just once. It was repetitive. And when he did get back to senses, he replicated with thousands of “I love you”, which I could never feel. People always show who they are. It is up to us, as to what we do when they show their true selves. As Maya Angelou said beautifully, “When people show you who they are, believe them!”
2. Why do you need the second lesson my dear readers, when the first one is too difficult to digest? Just reflect on the first one, and see who all you are allowing despite the fact that they don’t deserve to be in your orbit.
I must admit, my life was finished when I was with him.
But had he didn’t occur, I wouldn’t have found myself like I did, after he thankfully found so many flaws in me that the relationship had to get over.