Raw. Real. Unfiltered. Daily blogs. Often, less than 100 words
Mark Manson asked a question on Twitter today: List three things you wish you understood 10 years ago.
Here’s my response:
1. To say no in a potential relationship, where you know it ain’t going to work, is power.
2. Invest in equity.
3. Build a community.
PS: I was already working out, meditating, reading books and eating right at that point. So missed out these basics 🙂
Sometimes all I have is sympathy for our parents’ generation.
Their parents saw the partition of the nation – leaving their country, their childhood, all that they called “theirs”, to come to another place just to survive.
In this need for survival, was the generation of our parents born.
Thus, the upbringing they got was of stress, not having enough time, and always lack of means.
Which is why our parents are the way they are.
They have been conditioned so.
They were never taught to love.
Perhaps because they were never loved.
And then one fine day, we pop up and expect them to be cool because that is what we are surrounded by – cool kids just like us.
Now that we know, we can still do what we want to do, while being respectful of who they are. It isn’t just for them, it is for the acknowledgement of how much they are trying to adapt, because they care for you:)
The body – how it responds to chemical reactions is very very weird.
A few days back I mentioned how I bingewatched Dill Mill Gayye on a weekend.
The TV show, in many ways, was an inspiration for the people of my generation.
The cute people, the pure love, the sparks flying at workplace – everything.
Until I spent some time alone for so many years, getting to know the reality.
This morning I was reminded of one instance from the show – where the male protagonist goes on with a friend and feigns as her husband in front of her family, so that her family members stop pressing her for marriage. He does all this without informing the female protagonist, with whom he is deeply in love with.
Today, just by remembering that instance, I was sent into a state of feeling like crying, as to how this could happen.
Of course, a lot of this relates to the past mistakes I made.
Which brings me to the question – do we really forgive people or does our body remember everything?
If the body remembers it, it is up to the mind to practice focussed forgiveness – for a long, long period of time. Even when it is not asked for. Not for the other person. So that we go beyond our limitations that didn’t even exist.
Don’t we owe this to ourselves?
“I have dealt with so many bad clients.”
“Not all clients provide creative freedom.”
“I have the mind of steel now, while dealing with bad clients.”
Time and again, I see people documenting their bad experiences with their clients.
However, here is the truth:
They weren’t bad. They were just being themselves.
Maybe they were not trusted with money so they thought it is okay to pass on that belief.
Maybe their work never trusted so they did the same to you.
Or maybe maybe maybe you made the mistake in choosing the wrong professional relationship.
If we are aware, we always know in pre signing up conversations, how the other person is going to turn out to be.
If we truly look back at all our “bad” experiences, in our heart, we knew that before signing them up.
People rarely change.
They just reveal themselves.
It is up to us when we choose to see and when we choose to be blinded.
Even thebiggest happiness could being about a place of sadness if you happen to compare yourself to others.
Someone else, younger than you, is going to get all the things you have been waiting for.
Does it feel bad! Maybe yes.
Should it feel bad? The answer to this could never be yes.
What’s the solution, then? The solution is to put yourself in more I more situations like these because that only would help you work harder and challenge yourself more often.
Think over it. Someone else won, you lost; and then you created your own plan of confidence a reality.
1. The things that used to upset you do that anymore. Not even in your mind.
2. You learn from the times you lost money and don’t make the same money mistakes again.
3. You don’t lay the same expectations on people, if they have willingly proved they don’t want to stay true to the relationship (even blood relationships).
4. You find a way to laugh even amidst chaos.
5. You have replaced anger for people with empathy and sometimes even sympathy.
Growing up necessarily doesn’t mean in age. You may be in your 70’s and never learnt to control your anger.
Growth is a choice. The one that we make every single day.
In the absence of which, we just die.
Today I attended a wonderful master class by Nir Eyal, author of the book Indistractable.
Some wonderful things he said:
1. Schedule everything – learning, work, leisure, family time, sleeping time, free time social media and even OTG!
2. To-Do lists should be done away with, because no one accomplishes all of those daily.
3. Instead, do whatever you had desired to accomplish during that time. That is powerful! You’ll then end up achieving MORE than your To-Do list.
4. Life is NOT about getting things done. Rather spend 30-45 minutes daily, thinking.
5. And last resort, make an identity pact: Is what you are doing aligned with who you are?
Very very thoughtful! This master class is definitely going to be a masterpiece.
Off-late I have started teaching Maths to my nephew and niece.
9th standard kids. Unable to understand it in Zoom classes. So we do another Zoom whiteboard instead 🙂
Here’s what few days of teaching have taught me:
Pros:
1. Be enthusiastic with kids and they will reflect that back every day.
2. If you clear their basics, they will we propelled themselves to go to RD Sharma (I know!) to do further.
3. Damn their innocent voice! Or maybe its my love for them <3
Cons:
I discovered one about myself: To accept everyone at their own speed instead of expecting everyone to be at the same one.
Life gets so much better when you hang out with the right people, in whatever manner 🙂
A friend I know, has been working on YouTube channel of a celebrity. They are a team of four people managing different tasks.
Looking at all of this, an agency approaches them and hires them.
And now the plot twist begins.
The guy who is the main speaker of the videos tries to copy everything of that celebrity.
The way he speaks.
The colours of his clothing.
Video lengths
And of course, the team 🙂
Except just one thing: This celebrity’s mindset. The celebrity’s humility. The celebrity’s wisdom to let people do their own thing instead of dominating them.
So he does all these things the opposite.
Just like all people who want to copy but not emulate.
We all draw our external imageries from people around us. Nothing wrong with it.
However, if we do not work around creating our right vibe and mindset, and just refuse to change, no celebrity would ever be able to help us.
Growth is a personal responsibility. Not something you can pay others and expect to happen with the same old angry and resistant methods.
To be a boss lady, you do not have to become the boss of the team. You just have to be the boss of your life.
Lemme show that to you with an example:
If you observe closely, in Pic 1 I am having a fake smile versus I’m just being a natural in Pic 2.
Why so? Because that day I was going to do something that I should have said no to. So I was not in my best frame of mind. It is from 2018.
In pic 2, from March 2021, I’m just myself all the time. Being happy, saying no to things that don’t matter, and more than anything else, being the boss of my life.
So, if you want to be the Boss Lady, just live your life on your own terms. And not to impress anyone.
Anger. The word whose existence kills most relationships.
Even when people are aware that they need to stop getting so angry, why aren’t they able to change it?
Because they want their needs to be met first.
I want to be respected by my friends.
I want to earn more than a colleague.
I should be the priority for getting perks.
I want…
And when we don’t get these things we get bruised in our minds. That inner hurt is reflected as anger, sooner or later.
What if, we try the other way round?
I respect my friends and I know they also love and respect me, even if they don’t express it.
What I earn is right for me and whatever raise I deserve, will come to me.
Everyone is getting all the perks they deserve. It’s us vs me.
It turns out, when we change the inner conversation, the outer and inner anger vanishes.
Guess who is responsible for our anger then?
Guess who has the power to change it?
The power we look for outside, is the inner power we do not use.
1. Life’s good. Enjoying work. And non-work.
2. Tried buying an iPad from Apple site, no deliveries as of now. Beta, thode din aur 🙂
3. Mom will make ice cream tomorrow. Since I cannot eat anything beyond dal rice roti subzi (i.e., no chhole, rajma, curry, mathri, etc.,) due to surgery, we came to a softer, easily digestible option.
4. Looking at the quantum of work I do, should I start charging more? Nope. I’ll manifest it. And let people pay me more out of will.
5. A prospect who converted has a problem understanding whatever I write on emails / messages. So then we have to get on a call. The entire process wastes a lot of time for me. Thinking of saying no to them tomorrow. Time is money. Not that I have communication issues. Rest all work perfectly well with messages / emails and once a week / fortnight calls.
6. Waiting to tell the new job info to my team at the right time 🙂
7. Gotta respond to the diligent guy who worked on the website. Been long.
8. Content, content, quiz, class, posting, uploading – six huge tasks for tomorrow. Gonna be fun.
9. Also gotta file the claim for hospitalisation. Saturday.
10. Did I tell you, idli still tastes good, despite having it a lot of times post surgery?
That’s it folks, stay safe and keep rocking 🤘🏻
If you have time for Instagram and no time for some important tasks of your life, something needs to change in the list of your priorities.
Last year, I resigned from my job in March 2020, got relieved in June 2020.
Started freelancing then. Learnt multiple ways of sourcing new clients. Did wonderful work. Made a bit less than my salary but absolutely loved every day of the last one year.
After all this hustle, this April I got myself to a place where I was making more than my last drawn salary. And lo and behold, I got a job offer (that begins on 1st June) for a job I love.
So I said no to some of the prospective clients, said yes to working with some of those along with working full time on the job. And I guess we will 2X my last drawn salary at the start of the new job, leaving how things take us further to the future.
So, it is easy to demotivate myself by saying “I was jobless for a year”. Well, this is how society has conditioned us to believe.
Except, the truth is:
1. I finally had the courage to pursue my passion of writing, by giving up the stability of a full time job.
2. That taught me sales, negotiation and persuasion skills, along with polishing my skill set as a writer.
3. I was able to try an internship in content creation, among other things, that finally lead me to having a full-time job as Content Manager with one of the top brands of India.
4. I was responsible and accountable for my time.
5. I was finally not killing myself daily.
Thus, I was (and still am) living a life of choice. A privilege a lot of us have however very few of us have the courage to live by it.
The best part? For the first time in life I’m going for a job for which there is no degree on my resume, just a skill set and an experience to prove its mettle. Isn’t that amazing? 🤩
Okay! A week long break from blogging. First time in the history of this blog!
But never mind, I’ll make up for this.
So the reason for the miss-out was that I was admitted in hospital 8 days back for appendix surgery. Got discharged yesterday. And now I feel a bit active in the mornings so getting back to work drop by drop.
Rest all okay. It was a part of life. Came and went. Chill 🙂
Looking forward to talking to you daily now.
If you tell people that you need help, they will reach out to you for helping.
However, we need to see to it that we ask 🙂
Today I’ll share some strange things about me. Which are 100% true.
With that, there’s a strange twitter thread I wrote about how I work only for two hours per day. There you go! Enjoy 🙂
Yes, it is the most positive word of 2020 and 2021, given the situations we are in.
However, what happens if a report is positive?
Do we dread death? Or are we scared if our family would be affected? Or do our deepest fears pop up?
The big wrong is not with the Covid. The big thing we have to deal with is not having to be alone. And that’s scary.