- You want people to love you on posting your insta photos, and yet you do not want to understand people at the root, for who they are.
- You find solace in more meetings and less solo execution.
- You think therapy without taking responsibility of your life will heal you.
- You think you can be your raw, unpolished self and yet have all the love in the world.
- You want to have incremental money every month, and that in itself, is a trap.
- You want people to love your insta stories, while secretly hating the people whose approval you crave for.
- You know you are not okay, and all your efforts are directed towards showing that you are okay, instead of healing the un-okay part of you.
Tag: choices
Some unpopular opinions that are sadly true:
- Even the most intellectual person likes the coolest kids, even if they are dumb.
- We are so addicted to our problems that we actually create them!
- People love to help. If you keep disregarding their love, they don’t become cold blooded. YOU make them cold blooded.
- You don’t crave sugar. You crave the reward of feeling good.
- You speak the most through silence.
1. Why do we think we are liked if we have more unread messages when we open WhatsApp?
2. What satisfaction to softdrinks give?
3. Why do people prefer ordering out instead of home made halwa?
Our importance, satisfaction and satiety – all come from inside.
Inner validation. Water at home. Halwa at home.
If you make those choices, you are unstoppable!
Think of an unhappy person around you.
Most probably, they would have a constant reason for unhappiness in their life – a job, a relationship, anything they hate.
Then, go back to the time when that relationship / job didn’t exist. Before that, there was something else that kept them unhappy.
It turns out, being unhappy is never dependent on life situations. It is always a factor of how you deal with life situations.
I have seen happy people boldly get out of jobs they didn’t like. Meanwhile, they still made sure to be happy at it.
I have seen happy people be happy despite the pay cuts during the pandemic. Because they chose to be happy.
Also, I have seen unhappy people get more dissatisfied by the day, despite all they needed was there and was getting bigger.
The more we realise happiness is a choice, the more will we be able to make the choice of being happy.
The world is filled with wonderful people. And I mean it!
However, it is heartbreaking to see those really capable not hold themselves accountable for everything in their lives.
For example, some of the excuses that are given that shouldn’t exist:
- I couldn’t find that influencer’s email:
O c’mon Bro! Digging out emails, creating permutations and combinations, and checking if the email is right is exactly what uncle Google is your home page. We can find out ANYONE’s email ID, if we are willing to do the research 🙂 - You are strong, so you can do it:
Strong people become strong on the pillar of tons of tears and wisdom of words from the right books to minutest minutes of meditation that we think are insignificant. Being strong is a choice, and this comes from someone who has been through valleys of weakness and now does not allow those weaknesses to touch her. - I have registered this event in my mind:
Someone does something bad to us once by mistake and we forget all the good they did to us as well as all the time we spent in building that relationship. Is that the value we want to place to the people we love?
We are a product of either of two things: the imaginations we create without a limit or the non-existent limits we place on ourselves daily.
5 things only rich people do because poor people cannot afford to do them:
- Forgive others and themselves (the one who feels insulted is the one who has a ton of ego. The rich, forgive without being asked for it.)
- Taking care of their health as well as mind.
- Think of others
- Think of themselves
- Give without letting anyone know
Don’t you think so?
This was a random question by one of my smart school friends on one of my tweets.
It got me thinking.
Not to think of what to respond, rather to think of where we have landed ourselves.
We want evidences of thoughts we think intuitively.
We want to buy a car recommended by most people.
We want to wear the brand our boss wears because subconsciously it would make us look cool in front of him.
We want to send our kid to the school that promises best education, unmindful of the fact that the best schooling happens at home.
We want to…
All these are good wants. But that’s all they are. Wants.
They override the innate need that we all have: Needs.
One of our fundamental human needs is listening to our intuition. It will never have evidences. Nor does it want any. It is full by itself not having to want (or need) any validation.
These life lessons are deep, and never shared.
Here you go:
- Imitate the one you want to become. Allow for no deviation with lesser standards.
- A drunkard doesn’t have awareness of the world around them. Are you so much drunk in what you have and what you are becoming, that you don’t have awareness of the negativity and poison around you?
- A phone connection is flawless when we have a clear network. Is your network to your intuition clear, or is it flawed by opinions of others?
- Desire is the seed of killing yourself, if you know you know.
- Being kind and having sweetness in your demeanour isn’t a waste. It is, in fact, the best thing you could do to yourself. And the world, which by default worships the rare diamonds.
PS: Number 6 — Diamonds are formed under pressure 🙂
Having some weird ideas, don’t know when (or if) I’ll be executing on them, but let’s see:
- Be an English teacher to Class 11 and 12 students.
- Have a coaching curriculum online.
- Open a piano (read: keyboard) only Instagram account.
- Adopt a plant.
- Get on a counselling with millennials and GenZ (just like in my book Fit Doesn’t Fit)
- Do nothing for a week, other than reading and reflecting.
- Switch off the phone for a day a week. (Soon to be!)
Let’s see where things go:)
Btw, 1, 2, 6 and 7 are in progress – which may even lead to 5 getting somewhere in place. Let’s see!
The suffering you are going through is the creation of your brain.
I was suffering over something for a month, and this is what I realised today, just like with every other suffering 🙂
The vibe never lies.
Your soul shouldn’t be exchanged even in lieu of diamonds.
In the past two weeks, I said no to two writing gigs that could have made me six figures.
And since the money involved is too big, first response is to ignore everything and jump on it.
However, in both those cases, I realized I wouldn’t be happy or be myself – I would be just putting a price tag on my soul. And that is the last thing I signed up for.
Thus, I said no. Without surprise, felt light and easy beyond measure.
The best Content Writer is also a contented writer – who is feeling contented with every business relationship they have.
That doesn’t mean not having more gigs. However, that does mean feeling happy while doing the work – and trusting yourself, that when you say no when the vibe doesn’t match, much better ones with better vibes come to you.
Standing for yourself is priceless.
Flip rotis with patience.
Eat with patience.
Drink water with patience.
Warm-up and cool down with patience.
Also, be patient with yourself – because if being critical could help, it would have helped by now.
If you want better results, make better choices.
If you want the same results, make the same choices.
If you want worse results, do nothing.
We are not what we do. We are what we choose to do. And that makes a world of difference.
My bro and bhabhi have been married for almost 4 years now.
After having a bit of knowledge and research into psychology, it is a great thing to see a relationship like this.
It isn’t about couples, rather every relationship. The way they respect each other, the way they have fun with each other, and most importantly, the way neither of them loses on their individual personality despite being together – are rare things to be found in relationships these days.
If you have managed to protect at least 2 or 3 relationships like this, you’re a rich human.
You know if it is right or not.
Wrong does not require efforts. Right does.
Efforts or nothing. We make a choice every single minute.
Think of a recent WhatsApp group chat.
You were away while that chat was happening, and you read the conversation hours later.
When you’re done reading the chat, how do you feel?
Invariably your emotions are exactly same as those being exchanged in the chat.
The chat is simply written conversation. No one “said” anything to you. Yet now you feel those emotions.
Everything you read is just a thought.
Why not you write thoughts to yourself?
Why not read every single time, what you want to hear?
It’s easy. It’s simple. It’ll take just 15 minutes for you.
Will you? The answer depends on how serious you are for your life.
If something in the work goes wrong, do you own it up or let it hide under the covers – until it finally does come out!
If someone in the team has failed to deliver on a project, do you help them out or do you go to the manager?
If someone in family wants a solution, do you sit and listen?
What we stand for, stands along with us.
What we do, becomes our bio-data.
The real choice is when we have a dilemma, not when life is vanilla.
In all the things that everyone describes as “normal”, we all have one thing that we DON’T do.
Even if everyone in the world is doing it, we don’t do it.
In “Thinking, Fast and Slow”, the author Daniel Kanheman talks about why we tend to lower down the volume in the car while searching for parking spots – because parking requires a thought process and even music comes as a distraction.
It is such a subconscious process, that we hardly realise that we do
it. As it comes to doing weird things with my life, I can never work with music.
Nor can I read a book accompanied with music.
Not even meals :/
That focus is a necessity for me, and music comes in when I am seriously sitting idle or (the good old days) when we were allowed to drive on the roads:)
Like most people, I DON’T listen to music “at all times”!
Any decision that seems tough at the outset is not at all tough, though.
We just need to analyse what and how are we going to “feel” on choosing Option A over B.
What’s really tough, is taking out time to sit in solitude with yourself and work on mastering your mind.
When you start devoting that time to that daily, making tough decisions becomes the easiest thing to do.
The question, then, is to consider: “Am I willing to work upon myself to be able to ignore the lifetime regrets of taking wrong decisions?”
You could be pointing out what others are doing wrong.
You could even show strict evidences against it and show them on social media.
You could even probably share how you reached that conclusion.
And that all may be right. A hundred percent.
With a bit of problem: when we dig out dirt, what invariably tags along is foul smell.
That’s what bad thoughts and useless actions and irrelevant comments do to us.
You are a priceless human being created in the glory of the creator that created You. Don’t accumulate dust by taking in everything what others are not doing right.