Raw. Real. Unfiltered. Daily blogs. Often, less than 100 words
1. Watering plants makes you feel humbler and happier.
2. Your parents need nothing other than your presence.
3. Cleaning with wiper is both abs and back workout, sweeping the floor is a great cardio.
4. Home cooked chocolate cake is super delicious.
5. Life is wonderful without TV serials!
Recently I have started going deep into thoughts of Naval Ravikant and Kapil Gupta.
If you don’t know who they are, I won’t tell you bro, google them 🙂
And after reading their material, listening to their words – a strange thing happens!
All of a sudden, I derive zero pleasure in looking at posts on LinkedIn and Instagram.
The mind is drifted to a different plane of thinking, all of a sudden.
A place where it does not want to return from.
A place where the mind feels most nourished.
It’s immaculately strange, and conveniently the most beautiful place to be in.
Honesty I don’t know how to end this because I don’t want to preach you something, however I do want you to nudge to think deeper.
The mind thinks useless thoughts because it is conditioned to think so infinitely.
What if we start feeding our mind such such such powerful thoughts? Most people won’t, because misery loves company. The one or two that would, will change the world forever.
You really want to speak everything bad to that one person.
Except the fact that, that bad won’t change them either. It would just make them worse off.
You want to talk with that one person who does not want to talk with you.
Except the fact that, even if they start talking with you they won’t respect you anyway.
You want to change that one family member whose habits you’re not proud of.
Except the fact that, even if by a miracle of Aladdin’s Ginnie, even if they change – is your happiness always conditional on other people?
You want your team to love you.
Except the fact that, everyone loves only couch potato. For someone who is “doing something” will never be liked by all.
You want to….
Except the fact that, there will always be a “yang” to every “yin”, and vice versa.
Walking on the path of truth, is the only journey you’d be proud of!
No one ranked better because they shouted more. Okay, in the short term, they did.
No one became great because they took away credit for someone else’s creativity.
Absolutely no one ever won because they were great at making others feel like losers.
The way to getting better, is to get better.
The way to rising higher, is to make others rise as well.
The way to eternal goodness, is the eternal goodness for all.
Recently a new version of a popular song was launched in India.
The old version was a super hit, and was composed by one of the renowned names in the music industry.
Almost every Influencer on social media posted about how they adored the old version and the current version was lame. Yet the new version, as of this writing has 32Mn views on YouTube versus the old one having 26Mn.
If the old version was rightly more melodic, and everyone so rightly agreed to it, why is there a dramatic difference in the number of views they have?
Is it because it is easier to criticise and people were just exploring the facts to be rightly sure of it?
Or is it because we realise the importance of something great when we are served with something worse?
Or maybe, the mind loves consuming dancing cat videos more than a great inspirational talk – because consuming great content requires responsibility?
It could be any or all of them, yet it shows how much power we as humans are blessed with.
We can twist the wheel in any direction. The question is, which one we choose today?
Numbers
Followers
Salary
Likes and comments.
Four circles or three arrows in your car brand.
Centralised AC.
Chimney that doesn’t make any noise.
Success – we have measured it by metrics that world has taught us to.
Maybe it isn’t success. Maybe success is the way you really want.
There’s nothing wrong with material things, if you really want them.
If that’s not what really makes you happy, then we really need to live and grow by our own version of happiness.
The best way to be liked by others is to love yourself first.
The best way to bring that change is to be the change, as Gandhi said.
The best way to change the world is to change yourself first.
We probably know all the answers. What we perhaps need to do, is to tell yourself you are the answer.
Today I stumbled upon the failure resume of Ankur Warikoo. Was a wonderful peep into why this man is so humble despite having achieved so much in life.
Basis that I decided to prepare a failure resume of my life so far. Not about career as he did, rather what has made me strong so far.
I am often told by a lot of people:
“You’re too strong!”
“You understand things quite deeply.”
Also on the last day of my first job, my then boss (who had never said it), said me: “My indirect guru!”
While all these things may seem elating, this 28 year of life span has taught neither to be super-happy on appreciation, nor to be super-sad while being criticized.
Yet I was not born with this strength.
Here’s how I happened to develop it:
2002: Class VI – My then best friend found a new best friend all of a sudden. Not only I was friendless, I also sat in a corner while all others played basketball in games period.
Lesson learnt: I started becoming friends with everyone – na kaahu se dosti na kahu se vair. And bam! Started enjoying school life unlike ever before.
2003: Our whole family has decided to go to a park on a Sunday evening. Maa and sisters have prepared dahi bhallas and aloo tikki to be eaten up there. I am ready with my badminton and best hair band. My masi and my cousin have also come home – we will all enjoy together.
Just half an hour before we are about to leave, Papa says we won’t go. He blabbered some reason which I could intuitively feel were not right. He just said no means no.
Lesson learnt: I always make it a point to take my nephew / nieces to park – no matter how much I want to rest. They just know one thing: “If masi has committed, she will take us to the park and play with us.” (Without phone.)
2010: IIM – A, where the world goes to fulfill their dreams, I signed up for a nightmare. Went there for a day-long conference, and met the first person I fell in relationship with.
He liked nothing about me – absolutely nothing other than my skin colour. He became friends with my cousin, used to talk with her while I had already been thrown out of his life, and above everything – threw me out of his place on our last meeting.
Lesson learnt: Not yet bro, I had one bigger jolt to learn the lesson.
2011: The sister just older than me, who is also the closest one – gets engaged and married. After her marriage she faces some problems in her own life, because of which she couldn’t devote time to our relationship.
Lesson learnt: Learn to channel your loneliness into solitude. That’s when I fell in love with books for eternity.
2014: Nana died. I was one of his favourite kids. I go through all his last rites peacefully, strong as a rock. It came out naturally, didn’t have to do it.
Two weeks later, my Mom asked me: “Where do you bring so much power from? You didn’t even cry! I helped myself a lot just by looking at the way you conducted yourself and knowing what Nana meant to you!”
Lesson learnt (this time a powerful one): Keep filling yourself with power, over a period of time it will become automatic.
2016: Okay, this is the second jolt. Was exactly the photocopy of the first guy, with additional splice of anger, blame game and a ton of blackmailing.
I considered myself lucky to finally be able to get out of that.
Lesson learnt: Your life has a pattern. If it is following a pattern you aren’t proud of, reflect over it and change. (Disclaimer: Neither of these 2 persons were bad – they were just not right.) Also, learnt to say no gracefully and without any guilt.
2017: This is when I have started journaling a lot. Have started listening to God’s words. Have made a relationship with him. He is right there for me, every single time.
2018: Me and my best friend were supposed to go to Goa in January. We booked our tickets in July itself. Excitement was at its best. We were just reverse counting the days.
Somewhere around November, another friend of hers also books her tickets with us. I feel resentful in the beginning – it was a trip for both of us. Yet, I thought it was immature to react so much, and of course, my excitement belongs to me. I continued being excited.
In December 2017 I texted my friend: “Yayyy!!! Next month finally Goa!” She replied with a cold message, and asked if her friend would hamper our enjoyment. I said yes she would, however let’s focus on what’s working.
She said it’s better not to go then.
Cool. I cancel my tickets. She also tries to, yet since the refund is negligible, she decides not to cancel it.
Later around Christmas, she pushes me to book my tickets again. I choose not to, price is 4X now.
On the day of her take off, I am in a meeting onsite. Couldn’t take her call. Saw her message later that she just wanted to talk. I went back to my hotel room, call my sister, and cry a lot. A lottt.
Lesson learnt: To love your friends without any condition. We are still very good friends. Yet conditioned my mind to accept her where she is, instead of laying a bunch of expectations on her.
Also, I make God my bff now. We are just the best since then.
That’s it people, some small takes in this big picture called Life.
Gary Vaynerchuk, who posts a lot about optimism and hope, said once: I wish people could share their real struggles with everybody – the world would be so much lighter and happier if it happened.
That was the very reason I shared these struggles with you. Not to brag about what I went through. People have been through worse. Yet, when we know the process we honour the result and respect the journey.
Nothing is natural other than nature. We have become who we are.
From tomorrow, we’ll go back to possibility and power! Hasta-la-vista baby!!
New friends.
When you find new friends of course you feel great, you feel like you have arrived home.
Yet at the same time it’s it would be great to remember that those friends help you make you a bigger version of you, a better version of you.
Would be wise to not be like them rather being just the best version of you. Balance of love. Best of both worlds.
Yesterday I received a call from someone who usually does not talk with me. Also, I avoid talking with them because they consistently criticise me for my life choices. (Fun fact: This was not an ex :D)
However, instead of being more mindful, I happened to answer their call. And they followed suit – to give me opinions and tell why my life choices are not right.
This usually does not bother me, however the person on the other side was someone whom I respected in the past. A lot.
I finally hung down the phone and got myself back to normal through self-talk.
Today morning when I called up home, Papa asked: “Why are you appearing so out of place?”
While I ignored that question and drifted our conversation to other things, I finally told him everything.
Here’s how he responded to me:
1. You do not have to ignore their calls, just decide what you will pay attention to or what you will not pay attention to.
2. It may so happen that out of 10 bad things they say about you, one of those things really happen to turn out in your favour.
3. Learn to listen to critics, they are more valuable than friends, because they make you realise the importance of self-love.
Learning from wisdom and experience of elders truly collapses the learning curve.
PS: Love yourself, no one else is going to change their opinions to love you.
The goal is to be so internally fulfilled that even though you may have time, you don’t want to scroll Instagram.
The goal is to respect your introversion and work in a team simultaneously.
The goal is to look at what’s working in others versus where they lack, as this is what a loved one does (with some occasional nudges here and there).
The goal is to have an understanding. The understanding that fortunately comes from within and through reflection, not external factors including OTT or social media.
There are going to be times when people are going to throw stones at you.
There will be times when no one will understand you.
More than anything else, they will try to shatter you into pieces before you could believe it.
Amidst that external terror, just remember:
When you stay silent within and without, wonderful things happen. You tend to not listen despite they saying, and you tend to not get affected despite they trying too hard to.
You being unquestionable is up to you.
It’s so difficult to find the time to dig out the time to do most important things.
We think that we don’t have the time we need to schedule things and even if we try and schedule thinks we are not able to get the change you want to have.
Here’s a counterintuitive approach: just try to do five things every single day that you want to win the day.
You don’t have to who at the fag end of the day, they may be completed by 12 Noon or 3 PM.
For those things you want to know that when you have done those things you have won the day.
For example if you have a hard time working out put it out on your list: workout. If you have a hard time finishing up on that important project write it out on the list ProjectX and so on.
Do not keep more than five items not even six not even 7, not 10, not 20.
Because it’s not possible to accomplish 25 items a day, just focus on your five things by 12 noon by 11 o’clock in the morning by 3 PM at 5 PM whatever time feels right with you and live by that.
Your time your life would become a journey, a wonderful journey that you will be proud of and you’ll be super proud of it and super proud of the fact that you made the right decision.
Some productivity tips, not season specific or specific for place you’re working from.
Work every time, you just need to decide.
1. Don’t receive a call on the first time, unless it’s scheduled. It turns out, when you will call them back an hour or two later, the “important” work would’ve been resolved. So would be your time be saved.
2. Take a nap post lunch, do NOT engage in phone after lunch. Will make you happier, and of course, more productive.
3. One minute, every hour – take a break. Move, or sit still. However, just a break.
4. Have your goals for tomorrow, tonight itself. Your mornings will be saved from internet in the morning.
5. After having the goals for tonight, tell everything to God. Everything – good or bad, meetings, aha moments, etc., during the day – give it to Him. Surrender all good as a gratitude to Him, surrender all that is not good, to him to handle. You will be mesmerized at how your life starts falling in place.
That’s it folks! I could write a ten more; however doing less makes chances of execution better.
Some of the things we all must be grateful for, especially in these times:
1. That we have salt to add in our food.
2. We can call our parents and tell them “I love you.”
3. You are aware enough to be indoors, and not being stubborn and behaving like nothing has happened.
4. You have a peaceful night sleep.
5. There are doctors who work with patients who are infected, and still continue to serve.
6. Sun is rising daily.
7. You have a roof over your head.
8. You have a blanket.
9. Oxygen isn’t contaminated.
10. The selfless spirit of delivery boys, trash pickers, house maids, car cleaners, vegetables and fruit vendors, public transport drivers, etc., is way beyond we could ever imagine. Huge gratitude to them, for working when their families also want them to be home.
These are small, and hugely important things. If we would miss out on any of these, life would become very difficult or perhaps impossible in some cases.
Spend your free (and busy) time being grateful.
The things that affect you, are the things that control you.
The things that control you, are the things that decide your course of action.
The things that decide your course of action, should be something that needs approval from your happiness.
Now, think and decide: what’s something that’s affecting you right now?
Are you happy with it?
If not, why are you allowing it to affect it?
If you have ever been in a place where you’ve had no idea about what’s going on, consider the following:
• Are you allowing others to create your ideas?
• Are you making choices to impress others and yet hate the choices you’ve made?
• Are you eating more than what you should?
If you really want to move ahead in life, be your own teacher and correct yourself.
No one else is coming for your rescue. You already have the idea, you’re just ignoring it under the darkness of…you know under whose darkness.
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If there were a time machine to go back to the past and change it…
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…then you won’t have been as strong as you are today.
Be the master of time instead of being its victim.
Do you know why people enjoy Netflix and other streaming services?
Do you know why people go for YouTube Premium?
Do you know why people get their car tanker filled up when they leave the city for a long drive?
Do you know why people book return tickets for their journeys?
Do you know what is the reason people want to spend so much time with their families?
Here’s the answer: Unrestricted.
Everything above is unrestricted and therefore, very appealing and promising.
What if you made your state of mind like this?
This is not impossible, it is simply a choice. A choice to get away from people (including family and friends) who bring you down. Simply don’t care and keep working on yourself with blessing them. IDC and I appreciate you.
Your unrestricted life requires unrestricted goodness and zero opposites.
Sounds good?
Five seconds.
Just five seconds.
Just five seconds before he would have known that it’s going to be over.
What would have crossed Kobe Bryant’s mind when that did happen?
Perhaps a feeling of satisfaction and happiness for living a life he was proud of.
Perhaps the fact that he should have said “I love you” more often to people who mattered the most.
Perhaps the tragedy to see his daughter die along with him.
Perhaps none of these.
Whatever that may be, none of us know the time till when we are here.
Neither the one with the most money, nor the one who knows the most influential people.
All of us are cut from the same cloth of anonymity.
That’s what makes this life worth understanding and living.
Understanding and living.
Not postponing. No more “my time will come”, rather, my time is already here.
Right now. Otherwise, literally, never.