There is someone in my circle who comes across as a very sorted, chilled out person.
They are least affected by all the hype happening at work or in someone else’s life, don’t respond to extreme events, and enjoy their work the most.
Very recently, someone in the group asked them what was the biggest personal lesson of 2020.
You’ll be stunned at the response!
“I realize I am the biggest source of stress in my life.” They went on to say that in the nine months of Covid alone, they had developed more grey hair than all the past years combined together.
It made me think. I always used to think of her as a chilled out, I-don’t-give-a-damn kind of person. Maybe they are that. However, just because someone doesn’t show it, that doesn’t mean they aren’t carrying a heavy load.
For some people, the very nature of not showing is their way of dealing with their load.
Aceeptance, not judgement, opens the doors of empathy from us to them, instead of we pigeonholing them as ruthless.
Each human is suffering, and the best way to save them is acknowledge it first, instead of judging them
Negative things about getting a positive life
1. Honesty is an expensive gift. Don’t expect it from cheap people.
– Warren Buffet
2. When people show you who they are, believe them.
– Maya Angelou
3. The best way to deal with corporate politics is to live by and speak your truth. It will make you undefeatable.
4. People will play games against you. Worry not, for they not know against whom are they playing the real game.
5. Don’t trust your extremely good or bad moods. What happens in the middle – your intuitions, people’s behaviours, what you want to do – that is the real stuff.
Some small reflections about life, that were sadly not as positive, however, very important to inch towards positivity and not being affected by the negativity of others.
Everyone has a dark side.
I am good to you, but maybe I am not the same way to everyone, where I should be.
Someone is a good boss, but he fires one of his employees after every half a year.
A human being talks about culture, yet fails to maintain it for themselves.
What should we do when do have a dark side?
Here’s what: Think about challenging your beliefs in solitude. It would be hard, but then you would not be hard on others.
Last Friday, a founder and CEO of one of the groundbreaking startups in India approached me on LinkedIn. He wanted to speak to me for writing content for them.
When I responded to their DM to know more about the work, his first response was: “Thanks for the response,” and then we talked further.
Who does that in a mean world? Such a kind soul! He could write a social media post and get 100’s of writers in less than an hour, and still responding me with kindness? Wow!
So we spoke further and scheduled a meeting three days hence.
Almost two-and-a-half hours prior to the meeting, he sent me an email informing the meeting had to be inadvertently cancelled due to a family emergency. Not only that, he ensured to DM me on LinkedIn as well.
Of course, I understood and replied with an understanding and affirmative response.
That’s not the point. The point is he did not “need” to inform me before not showing up for a meeting, yet he informed me at two places – that too when it was a family emergency.
So so sooo fortunate to be working with such generous and kind folks. People who value the time and work of others just as theirs and not taking their art for granted are a priceless asset. Always.
Just that I got lucky, because the world doesn’t owe us anything. All the kindness and ease from clients like him is always a blessing to be bestowed upon. If you are one such kind soul reading this, thank you to you too! You rock <3 🙂
We had gone for an official team retreat. Most of us were staying in Noida, and we had gone for a 2D 1N stay in a resort in Gurgaon. The team was packed in 3-4 cars, one of which was mine. I was prepared to listen to the female-driver jokes, because not getting affected by them had become a forte by then.
I remember we had halted at a place, and the male colleague got out of the back seat and came to the driving seat to me, and said he will drive. That was rude, however in a society that anyway screws female drivers, this was a normal meme material. I politely refused, stating that I love driving long distances, and I wanted to drive.
While I did get a “chance” to drive, why am I sharing this story with you today?
Because when we say we need equal rights for women, et al, we need to remember that most often women willingly give up their rights.
Having the awareness to respectfully refuse, is the Super Power we didn’t even know existed.
Stand for yourself, people! How will anyone help you out if you aren’t in a position to help yourself out?
Met incredible people. Or met people that drained your energy.
Though both of these are good, what is great is how much time you spent with yourself alone.
If not, then whatever we do is going to be a replica of the world, not an originality.
We all go through different layers of friendships.
Starting with school. Then college friends. Then friends in our jobs. Succeeded by our latest friends.
In all these stages, we have some “hello” kind of friends, some are good friends, and some become our lifelong friends.
And as much as we believe that our latest friends are our best friends (of course, they are the ones who pop up on our Instagram stories), the older the friend, the greater the understanding.
No matter you cry and talk about your boss with your latest friends, your college friends actually know where that is coming from.
No matter how much nostalgic we are with our college friends and our wonderful memories, our school friends do not need that – they are our by default psychiatrists and psychologists.
Every relationship gets stronger with the passage of time, of course, when it is nurtured consistently.
Time is power in friendships, and not investing that is losing on exponential rewards of love and belonging to a community.
Last weekend, I was having a casual chat with a writer friend.
After exchanging pleasantries, I thanked him for helping me bag a wonderful client, to which he responded, “Thanks to YOU, it’s your hard work.” And thus, we continued being humble.
As the conversation proceeded, he told me he had also applied for a writing engagement, which was finally bagged by me.
Those words of him just moved me. Here I was, getting envious of the number of clients and interesting assignments he has, and here he was, perhaps having the same emotion as me.
Too often, we take the most important things in life for granted.
The work that brings food on our plate.
The parents (no matter how weird they are) that make us fight for our existence 🙂
The friends who make us realise we aren’t alone.
The colleagues and clients who understand us when we had expected to be fired.
And most importantly, counting the endless blessings in our life when the Life we have today was the life we had dreamt of years ago.
How will we get more and be more if we aren’t grateful for what we have already been blessed with?
Thank you, my dear friend, your humility was always an inspiration for me. Now you are an inspiration to be grateful for my blessings. You rock! Like always 🙂
One of the most fascinating things about life is mistakes.
More interesting than mistakes, is about studying people who make mistakes.
There are three kinds of people:
1. Who realise they have made a mistake, admit it, and try not to make the same mistake twice.
They are the top 1% of the world. Even if they are not famous, they are indispensable in whatever they do.
2. Who realise they have made a mistake, and don’t admit it.
The three-letter word comes in. However, there is still hope that they will learn from their mistakes, even silently.
3. Who do not realise they have made a mistake.
They are the people in deepest pain, and aren’t aware of it.
As much as we’d hate admitting it, we all are surrounded by someone in each category, the third one being the most vulnerable ones.
a. Bless them.
b. Focus on the good in your life versus the opposite in their life.
c. Chill man!
Everyone is fighting a silent battle we aren’t aware of.
The joy of life, is learning to deal with these people in an effortless manner, that you be responsible for not allowing anyone to take your happiness away.
One of the things our society is suffering with today, is lack of time.
As a kid, one of my dreams was to tell my father: Please deduct my pocket money for several months, whatever amounts to a day of your time, and spend some time with us today.
Fast forward to today: We are still trying to get along. We love each other, are there for each other during good and not-so-good times, however, I do wish I wasn’t appreciated for my ranks in class and rather appreciated for failing.
It is a constant battle of self-blame.
Also, he did and still does his best. And we do spend good time together.
However, if anyone of you reading here is a parent or intend to be so in the future, a small request: Don’t tell your kids: “I am doing it for you only!”
Kids need you, they will anyway learn to make money online. Online parents and understanding is not possible.